Dress to Feel Like Yourself
Thirty-two ways to dress to feel like yourself, because comfort and identity show in how you hold your body.
Clothes are part of your body language. Wear what lets you move and breathe.
40 tips that really help
These ideas come from Presence (Amy Cuddy), What Every BODY Is Saying (Joe Navarro), The Definitive Book of Body Language (Allan and Barbara Pease), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.
Clothes are part of your body language
What you wear says something before you speak, and it also changes how you feel and move. Clothes that fit well and suit you help you stand tall and relax, so you can focus on people instead of adjusting your outfit.
Think about the last time you felt great in an outfit and why.
Comfort first
If you are pulling, tugging or itching, your body language suffers. Choose clothes that let you move, sit and breathe.
Pick comfort for your next event.
Fit matters
Clothes that fit well look better than expensive clothes that do not. A simple tailor adjustment can transform an outfit.
Check fit.
Dress for the setting
Match the formality of the occasion. Slightly smarter than the room is usually safer than slightly sloppier.
Check the dress code.
Dress for the person you are meeting
Think about who will be there. A relaxed friend or a formal client call for different choices.
Think about the audience.
Dress for the weather
Being too hot or cold hurts your posture and mood. Dress in layers.
Check the forecast.
Dress for your body
Choose cuts, fabrics and colours that make you feel good, not what is merely trendy.
Choose what suits you.
Colours matter
Colours you like and that suit you lift your mood. Many people feel confident in their favourite colour.
Pick a colour you love.
Simple is strong
A simple, well-fitted outfit with one considered detail looks confident. Avoid too many competing elements.
Keep it simple.
Shoes matter
Comfortable, clean shoes help you stand and walk with ease. Pinching shoes ruin posture.
Check shoes.
Grooming helps
Clean hair, nails and teeth help you feel ready. They are part of body language.
Do a quick check.
Scent lightly
Light fragrance is fine. Strong scents can overwhelm.
Go light.
Accessories with care
Avoid noisy bracelets or things you will fidget with. Simple pieces help you stay still.
Choose quiet jewellery.
Bags and pockets
Heavy bags pull your shoulders. Carry what you need.
Lighten.
Prepare the night before
Choose and try on your outfit in advance so that you are not rushed. Calm mornings help.
Plan ahead.
Have a go-to outfit
A reliable outfit you feel good in reduces decision fatigue before important events.
Find one.
Dress for the camera
On video, solid colours look clean. Avoid tiny patterns. Check how it looks on screen.
Test it.
Dress for an interview
Aim slightly more formal than the role and ensure it is comfortable and tidy.
Rehearse.
Dress for a date
Be comfortable and yourself. Choose something that makes you smile.
Be you.
Dress for a party
Match the mood and choose something you can move in.
Move freely.
Dress for a presentation
Choose clothes that do not distract and let you gesture. Avoid anything you will fiddle with.
Check movement.
Dress for work
Reflect your role and your values. Comfortable, professional clothes help you perform.
Be consistent.
Dress for a funeral or sensitive event
Respect the mood and customs. Choose modest, quiet clothing.
Be respectful.
Dress for travel
Comfort and layers matter. Choose easy fabrics.
Pack well.
Dress for exercise
Wear clothes that support movement and body confidence.
Wear what feels good.
Do not dress to hide
If you dress only to hide your body, your posture may shrink. Choose what lets you stand tall.
Choose confidence.
Do not dress to impress others at your own cost
Dress to feel like yourself. Authenticity shows.
Be you.
Do not wear things that need constant adjusting
Fidgeting with clothes reads as nerves. Test your outfit before the day.
Test it.
Do not compare
Everyone has a different style. Compare only with your own best days.
Be kind.
Do not overspend
Good clothes do not need to be expensive. Thrift shops and sales help.
Be wise.
Remember culture
Dress customs vary. Learn local norms and respect them.
Observe.
Remember modesty and faith
Some people dress according to faith. Respect that and your own beliefs.
Be respectful.
Remember accessibility
Some people need adaptive clothing. Comfort and dignity matter for all.
Be inclusive.
Practise in the mirror
Check your posture and movement in your outfit. Adjust.
Mirror.
Ask a friend
A friend can tell you whether you look like yourself.
Ask.
Take care of your clothes
Clean, ironed clothes show care. A quick press helps.
Iron.
Declutter your wardrobe
Keep what fits and what you love. Fewer, better choices.
Clear out.
Celebrate feeling like yourself
When you feel at ease in what you wear, enjoy it.
Note it.
Enclothed cognition
A 2012 study by Hajo Adam and Adam Galinsky found that people wearing a white coat described as a doctor’s coat paid more attention on a task than those told it was a painter’s coat. What clothes mean to you can shape how you think and act.
Choose one outfit that makes you feel capable and wear it for a hard task.
Build a small capsule wardrobe
A handful of well-fitting, mix-and-match pieces removes daily stress and ensures you always have something that works. Fewer choices help you arrive calm.
Pick five pieces that all go together.
Easy things to say
When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many everyday situations.
“I love your jacket.”
“I felt great when I chose this.”
“Where did you find that?”
“Let me take off my jacket.”
“Thanks, that is kind.”
“It was good to see you.”
Your first week
One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.
Choose comfort
Fit well
Pick colours you love
Dress for the setting
Keep it clean
Add one favourite item
Stand taller
Further reading
- Presence (Amy Cuddy)
- What Every BODY Is Saying (Joe Navarro)
- The Definitive Book of Body Language (Allan and Barbara Pease)
The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.
More lessons in “Body Language”
Keep going. Small steps every day make a big change.
← Previous: A Handshake That Says YesNext: Greet First, Smile First →
- Your Posture Is Your First Sentence
- Stand Tall Without Stiffness
- The Open-Shoulder Reset
- Walk Into a Room Like You Belong
- Where to Put Your Hands
- Take Up Your Fair Share of Space
- Sit Like You Mean It
- The Warm Face Habit
- Smile With Your Eyes
- What Your Face Says When You Are Nervous
- Relax Your Jaw and Your Brow
- Look Interested Without Trying Hard
- Look Confident on Video Calls
- Read a Room by Reading Faces
- Open Palms Build Trust
- Gesture Between Shoulders and Waist
- Stop Fidgeting Without Effort
- Stop Touching Your Face
- Match Your Gestures to Your Words
- Hands in Pockets: Yes or No?
- The Power of Staying Still
- Crossed Arms Do Not Always Mean No
- Spot Comfort and Discomfort
- Notice Feet and Direction
- Mirror Gently to Build Rapport
- Check Words Against Body
- Read Before You React
- Ask Instead of Assuming
- The Ten-Second Entrance
- A Handshake That Says Yes
- Dress to Feel Like Yourself
- Greet First, Smile First
- Be Fully Present With One Person
- Leave a Warm Last Impression
- Body Language in a Job Interview
- Body Language on a First Date
- Body Language on Camera
- Body Language in Groups
- Body Language When Giving Bad News
- Your Daily Presence Practice
