What to Do When You Make a Mistake
Forty practical steps for what to do when you make a mistake, so you act quickly, calmly and honestly.
Mistakes are moments of truth. Act fast and own it.
40 tips that really help
These ideas come from The Speed of Trust (Stephen M. R. Covey), The Fearless Organization (Amy Edmondson), The Checklist Manifesto (Atul Gawande), and Black Box Thinking (Matthew Syed), and everyday practice. The first six help the most. Pick one and try it today.
Every seller makes mistakes: what matters is next
Every seller makes mistakes: a wrong price, a missed call, a late delivery, a careless word. The mistake itself rarely ends a relationship. What you do next decides whether trust is lost or deepened. The real test is the next ten minutes.
Think of the last mistake you made with a customer. Write down what you did next, and one thing that you would do better now.
Pause before you act
When you realise that you have made a mistake, your heart jumps and you want to act at once. But a rushed reaction can make things worse. A short pause, of a minute or two, lets you think clearly and choose well.
The next time you spot a mistake, stop for one minute. Breathe slowly, and write down the facts and the first step before you contact anyone.
Own it before they find it
If you tell the customer about the mistake before they find it, you are an honest partner. If they find it first, you are someone who hid it, even if you did not mean to. The difference in trust is huge. Look for your own errors, and tell the truth early.
Check your last week of work for any error that the customer has not yet seen. If you find one, contact them today, and tell them first.
Say sorry in the first hour
Time matters in an apology. The longer you wait, the more the customer worries and the more anger builds. A sincere sorry in the first hour shows that you care, and stops many problems from growing. Say sorry first, and promise more.
When you make a mistake that affects a customer, contact them within an hour. Say, ‘I am sorry. I have found a problem, and I am working on it.’
Find out exactly what happened
Before you explain or fix, find out what truly happened. A guess can lead you to the wrong apology or the wrong cure. Collect the facts quickly: what went wrong, when, who was affected and what the cause was.
When a mistake appears, write four lines: what went wrong, when, who is affected and what is the cause. Check each line before you speak.
Tell the customer first, not last
The customer should hear about the problem from you, not from a third party or by chance. If they are the last to know, they feel disrespected. If they are the first, they feel valued, even in bad news. Tell them yourself, and tell them early.
Next time something goes wrong, tell the affected customer before you tell anyone else outside your team. Call, if you can.
Say what you will do, and by when
A sorry without a plan feels empty. The customer wants to know what you will do about it, and when. A clear plan, with a time, turns an apology into action and gives them something to hold on to. Say it simply, and then do exactly that.
In your next apology, add one sentence: ‘Here is what I will do, and when.’ Write down the time, and keep it.
Never hide a mistake
Hiding a mistake is the surest way to turn a small problem into a large one. When it is found, the customer will ask, ‘Why did you not tell me?’ The mistake can be forgiven. The hiding is much harder to forgive.
Ask yourself honestly: is there any mistake that I am hiding or hoping will pass? If yes, tell the right person today.
Do not make excuses
‘It was not my fault.’ ‘The system crashed.’ ‘No one told me.’ Excuses may be true, but they sound like blame. The customer does not need your reasons first. They need to know that you take responsibility and will fix it.
In your next apology, say, ‘I am responsible, and I am sorry.’ Give a short explanation only if they ask, and only after you have owned it.
Turn the mistake into a lesson
Every mistake carries a lesson. If you learn it, the mistake becomes an investment. If you do not, you will pay for it again. After the storm has passed, ask: What can I learn? What can I change? A mistake that makes you better is not wasted.
After your next mistake is fixed, write three lines: what happened, what I learned and one change I will make.
Tell them the plan before they ask
After a mistake, the customer has questions in their mind: What will you do? When will it be fixed? Will it happen again? If you answer these before they ask, you calm their fear and show that you are in control. A clear, early plan is a gift of peace.
Next time you must tell a customer about a problem, include three things up front: what you will do, by when and how you will keep them informed.
Tell your team what you learned
A mistake that stays in one head helps one person. A mistake shared with the team helps everyone. After you have fixed the problem, tell your colleagues what happened and what you learned. Do it without shame, and without blame.
Share one mistake from this month with your team, in a short, calm note: what happened, what you learned and what you changed.
Forgive yourself, then fix it
After a mistake, many of us punish ourselves, replay it and feel shame. A little guilt can help us learn, but too much blocks us from acting. Forgive yourself, so that you can think clearly and fix what needs fixing. It is a base for action.
After your next mistake, say to yourself: ‘I made a mistake. I am human. Now I will fix it.’ Then take the first step.
Calm your body before you speak
When we feel guilt or fear, the body reacts: a fast heart, a tight chest, a shaking voice. If you speak to the customer in this state, you may sound defensive or nervous. Breathe slowly, drop your shoulders and speak slowly.
Before your next hard call, breathe in for four counts and out for six, three times. Drop your shoulders, and say your first sentence slowly.
Keep the message short and clear
When you tell a customer about a mistake, do not write an essay. A long message looks like hiding or excuses. A short, clear one shows confidence and respect: what happened, what you are doing and when they will hear next. Five or six lines are enough.
Write your next apology message in six lines or fewer: sorry, what happened, what you are doing, when, and a warm close.
Fix the problem before the blame
When something goes wrong, the first need is to fix it. Blame can wait. A hunt for the guilty wastes time and spreads fear. Fix the problem first, and look at causes afterwards, in a calm review. Focus on the customer and the repair.
The next time something goes wrong, say to your team: ‘Let us fix this first. We will look at causes later.’ Then assign the first action.
Check how big the damage is
Before you decide what to do, find out how far the harm goes. Who else is affected? What did it cost? Is it still happening? A clear view of the damage lets you apologise properly and repair fully. Look wide, and be honest.
When a mistake appears, list: who is affected, what it cost them in time and money, and whether it is still going on.
Stop it from growing
Some mistakes keep causing harm until they are stopped: a wrong price still online, a faulty product still shipping, a wrong message still going out. The first act is often to stop the harm. Ask: what can I do right now to stop it spreading?
When a mistake is ongoing, take one stopping action at once: pause the shipment, remove the page or hold the message. Then tell the customers affected.
Offer to make it right
An apology is words, and making it right is action. Customers want to know that you will repair the harm. Offer something real: a fix, a replacement, a refund or extra help. Ask them what would make it right, and listen.
In your next apology, ask, ‘What would make this right for you?’ Listen, and offer what you can do, clearly and fairly.
Pay for your mistake when it is fair
If your mistake cost the customer money, it is only fair to pay. A refund, a credit or a covered cost shows that your words are backed by action. It tells them you value the relationship more than a small sum. Do it gracefully, without being forced.
Check any recent mistake for cost to the customer. If there is one, offer to cover it, without waiting for them to ask.
Do not blame others
When a mistake involves a team, it is tempting to point at others: ‘The warehouse made an error’, ‘My colleague forgot’. But to the customer, you are the business. Blaming others looks weak and harms your colleagues too. Speak as one team.
In your next apology, say ‘we’ for the team’s part, and ‘I’ for your own. Never name a colleague as the cause to a customer.
Do not blame the system
‘The system is down.’ ‘The computer made an error.’ ‘It is company policy.’ These sound like reasons, but customers hear them as walls. The customer does not deal with a system. They deal with you. Own the experience, and use your own words.
Next time something is caused by a system, avoid saying ‘the system’. Say, ‘We had a problem, and here is what I will do for you.’
Tell your manager early
If you make a serious mistake, tell your manager early. They may help to fix it or to protect the customer. Hiding it from them only makes things worse. Managers usually prefer bad news early to a surprise later. Bring the facts and a plan.
If you make a serious mistake, tell your manager within an hour. Say: ‘Here is what happened, here is what I have done and here is what I propose.’
Call, do not only write
For a serious mistake, a call is better than an email. Your voice shows sorrow and care, and the customer can ask questions at once. An email can feel cold, or like a way to avoid a hard talk. Call first, then follow with a short written summary.
The next time you must report a serious problem, call the customer. If they do not answer, leave a calm message, and follow with an email.
Send a written summary after the call
After a call about a mistake, send a short written summary. It confirms what you said, what you will do and when. It avoids misunderstandings and gives the customer something to keep. Send it the same day.
After your next apology call, send a three-part email within an hour: what happened, what you will do and when you will be in touch.
Apologise in person for a big mistake
For a big mistake, such as one that cost much money, harmed a person or damaged a project, a call may not be enough. A visit shows the weight of your regret. You come to them, face to face, and take the discomfort on yourself.
For a serious error, ask: ‘May I come and speak with you in person?’ Prepare your words, and go with a clear plan.
Check in again after the fix
When the problem is fixed, do not disappear. A short check-in a few days later, asking if all is well, shows that you care about the result and not only about ending the trouble. It is often the moment when trust truly returns.
A few days after you fix a problem, send a short note: ‘I wanted to check that everything is working well now.’
Thank them for their patience
After a mistake, the customer has waited, worried and perhaps lost time. A sincere thank-you for their patience shows that you see what it cost them. It turns a one-way apology into a shared moment of respect. Say it specifically and warmly.
After a problem is solved, send a short note: ‘Thank you for your patience while we fixed this. I know that it was not easy.’
Write down what happened
After a mistake, write down what happened while it is fresh: the date, the facts, the actions and the results. A written record helps you learn, protects you from misremembering and gives others the chance to learn too. Keep it factual and calm.
After your next mistake, write one page: what happened, when, what you did, what the result was and what you will change.
Find the root cause
Fixing the symptom is not enough. If you do not find the root cause, the mistake will return. Ask ‘why’ again and again until you reach the real reason. Often the cause is a gap in a process, a missing check or unclear roles, and not a careless person.
Take your last mistake, and ask ‘why?’ five times. Write each answer. Stop when you reach a cause that you can change.
Change the process, not only the person
When a mistake happens, the easy response is to blame a person. But if you only correct the person, the process stays weak, and the next person may fall in the same hole. Change the process, so that it is hard to make the same mistake again.
Look at your last mistake. Ask: what change in the process would make it hard to happen again? Make that change this week.
Use a checklist next time
Even experts forget steps when they are busy. A short checklist is a simple, powerful way to prevent mistakes. Pilots and surgeons use them, and so can you. Make a checklist for any task where a mistake would hurt.
Choose one task where mistakes are costly, such as sending a quote. Write a five-line checklist for it, and use it every time this week.
Practise your response in advance
You can prepare for mistakes before they happen. Think of the errors that are likely in your work, and plan how you would respond. Write the first lines of the apology and practise them aloud. When a real mistake comes, you will respond calmly and well.
List three mistakes that could happen in your work. For each, write a two-line first response, and say it aloud once.
Make a mistake plan for your team
A team that has a plan for mistakes acts faster and with less fear. A simple plan says who is told, who speaks to the customer, who fixes and how we learn. When a problem arrives, no one wonders what to do. Write it on one page, and share it.
Hold a thirty-minute team session. Write a one-page plan: who is told, who calls the customer, who fixes and how we learn.
Admit small mistakes quickly too
It is easy to admit big mistakes, since they cannot be hidden. The real test is the small ones: a typo, a late reply, a forgotten line. If you admit these quickly, you build a habit of honesty. Say it lightly, and fix it.
Today, if you make any small mistake, say so at once: ‘Sorry, I made a typo. Here is the correct number.’ Notice how people respond.
Learn from the mistakes of others
You do not need to make every mistake yourself. You can learn from the errors of others, in your own company, in your field and in the news. Treat every public failure as a free lesson, and ask how it could have been avoided.
This week, read about one failure in your field. Write down what went wrong, and one habit that you will adopt to avoid the same.
Share a mistake story to teach
A story about a mistake you made, and what you learned, is a gift to others. It shows that you are human and teaches more than a rule. When leaders share mistakes, they give others courage to speak honestly. Tell it with humility.
Choose one mistake from your past, and write it as a short story: what happened, how you felt, what you did and what you learned. Share it with a colleague.
Be honest about what you do not know
Many mistakes come from pretending to know. ‘I am sure that is right.’ ‘It will be fine.’ When you do not know, say so: ‘I am not sure. Let me check.’ This honesty prevents errors, and it makes your word more trusted when you do speak with certainty.
Next time you are unsure, say, ‘I am not sure. Let me check, and I will tell you by three.’ Then check, and keep your word.
Rebuild with small, kept promises
After a mistake, trust is rebuilt not by big words, but by small, kept promises. Each time you say, ‘I will call at three’, and call at three, a little trust returns. Over weeks, these small acts repair the bridge.
For the next month with a customer who was hurt, make only small promises, such as ‘I will email by noon’, and keep every one.
Make mistakes safe to report
If people are afraid to report mistakes, they will hide them, and small problems grow into big ones. A team that feels safe to say ‘I made an error’ catches problems early and learns fast. Thank people who report, and never punish honesty.
This week, thank one person who reported a problem. Say in public, ‘Thank you for telling us early. That helps us all.’
Easy things to say
When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many sales conversations.
“Let me take a breath and think this through.”
“This was my mistake.”
“I wanted you to hear it from me.”
“Here is how I will put it right.”
“Here is what I will change.”
“Thank you for your patience.”
Your first week
One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.
Write a mistake response checklist
Practise your first sentence
Fix one pending issue
Create one prevention step
Tell your manager of an error
Review your last mistake
Share lessons with your team
Further reading
- How to Win Friends and Influence People (Dale Carnegie)
- The Go-Giver (Bob Burg and John David Mann)
- The Trusted Advisor (David Maister and others)
The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.
More lessons in “Build Trust That Lasts”
Keep going. Small steps every day make a big change.
← Previous: Build a Simple Relationship SystemNext: A Sincere Apology That Works →
- Smile Like You Mean It
- Use Their Name the Right Way
- Find Common Ground Fast
- Match Their Pace and Energy
- Small Talk That Opens Doors
- Be Interested, Not Just Interesting
- The First Five Minutes Checklist
- Do What You Say You Will Do
- Be Honest About What You Cannot Do
- Share Bad News Early
- Admit a Mistake and Fix It Fast
- Give Before You Ask
- Show Proof Instead of Making Claims
- Keep Promises Small and Real
- Be an Expert Who Teaches
- Give Free Value That Matters
- Recommend What Is Right, Even If It Is Smaller
- Tell Customers What You Would Do
- Be Independent and Honest
- Think Long Term, Not This Month
- Make Customers Smarter
- Open Posture, Open Mind
- The Right Amount of Eye Contact
- A Voice That Feels Safe
- Mirror Without Mimicking
- Dress for the Customer You Serve
- Make Video Calls Feel Personal
- Read Signs of Discomfort
- Remember the Small Details
- Send the Unexpected Thank-You
- Check In Without Selling
- Celebrate Their Wins
- Introduce People to Each Other
- Build a Simple Relationship System
- What to Do When You Make a Mistake
- A Sincere Apology That Works
- Turn an Angry Customer Into a Fan
- Rebuild Trust After a Missed Deadline
- When a Customer Doubts You
- Rise Above Gossip and Reviews
