Making Friends / How to Follow Up / Lesson 38

LESSON 38 · HOW TO FOLLOW UP

Send Little Notes for No Reason

Thirty-two easy ways to send little notes for no reason, the sweetest habit that keeps friendships glowing.

Small notes are big gifts. No reason is the best reason.

29 tipsEasy things to say7-day plan

Start with tip 1

Jump to the 7-day plan

29 tips that really help

These ideas come from Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi), Platonic (Marisa Franco), How to Win Friends and Influence People (Dale Carnegie), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.

TIP 1

The power of random kindness

A note with no reason or request feels special because it is pure care. Few people send them, so they stand out.

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Send one.

TIP 2

Think of someone

Who crossed your mind? Write to them now.

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Choose.

TIP 3

Send a memory

Mention a happy memory you shared. It brings joy to both.

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Recall one.

TIP 4

Send a compliment

Tell them what you admire about them. Sincere praise lingers.

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Praise them.

TIP 5

Send a photo or link

Share something that made you smile and say it made you think of them.

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Share.

TIP 6

Send a song

Music can bring back warmth quickly. Send one with a short line.

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Send one.

TIP 7

Send a handwritten card

A real card is a rare treat. Post one now and then.

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Post a card.

TIP 8

Send a voice note

Your voice makes it personal. Keep it short and happy.

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Record one.

TIP 9

Keep it short

One to three lines is perfect. Brief notes are easy to enjoy.

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Trim.

TIP 10

Add no pressure

Say, no need to reply. People may reply anyway.

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Add it.

TIP 11

Mix people

Old friends, new friends, family and colleagues all enjoy them.

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Vary.

TIP 12

Make it a weekly habit

Send two or three each week. Small habits build big warmth.

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Plan it.

TIP 13

Script: hello

Just a little hello from me, hope your day is lovely. Say it warmly.

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Use it.

TIP 14

Script: memory

I smiled today remembering our trip to the coast. Say it brightly.

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Use it.

TIP 15

Script: praise

You are such a good friend, I wanted you to know. Say it sincerely.

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Use it.

TIP 16

Script: share

Saw this and thought of you, hope it makes you smile. Say it lightly.

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Use it.

TIP 17

Script: closing

No need to reply, just sending a hug. Say it gently.

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Use it.

TIP 18

Mistake: asking for something

A favour spoils a pure gift, so keep it separate.

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Keep it kind.

TIP 19

Mistake: expecting a reply

Expectations spoil the joy, so send and let go.

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Release it.

TIP 20

Mistake: sending the same note to everyone

Personal details matter, so tweak each one.

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Personalise.

TIP 21

Mistake: sending too many

Daily floods become noise, so keep a gentle rhythm.

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Pace.

TIP 22

Troubleshoot: when you feel silly

Silly is fine. Kind notes are rarely seen as odd.

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Do it.

TIP 23

Troubleshoot: when you run out of ideas

Keep a list: songs, memories, compliments, photos. Use it.

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List.

TIP 24

Troubleshoot: when they do not reply

Do not worry. The note still did its work.

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Stay glad.

TIP 25

Troubleshoot: when you feel low

Sending a note to someone can lift your mood too. Try it.

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Reach out.

TIP 26

Troubleshoot: when it is a new friend

Keep it light and not too frequent. Build slowly.

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Go gently.

TIP 27

Drill: three notes this week

Send three little notes this week with no reason. Track the smiles.

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Do it.

TIP 28

Drill: collect ideas

Keep a note of ideas for kind messages. Add to it daily.

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Collect.

TIP 29

Drill: send one card

Write and post one card this month. Enjoy the surprise.

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Post it.

Easy things to say

When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many everyday friendships.

NOTE

“Just a little hello from me.”

MEMORY

“Remember our trip? I smiled today.”

PRAISE

“You are a great friend.”

SHARE

“Saw this and thought of you.”

WISH

“Hope your day is lovely.”

CLOSE

“No need to reply.”

Your first week

One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.

DAY 1
Think of someone

DAY 2
Pick a note type

DAY 3
Write a line

DAY 4
Add a detail

DAY 5
Send it

DAY 6
Do it weekly

DAY 7
Enjoy it

Further reading

• Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi)
• Platonic (Marisa Franco)
• How to Win Friends and Influence People (Dale Carnegie)

The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.

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These lessons share general learning and everyday ideas. They are not medical or mental health advice. If you feel very anxious, low or unwell, please talk to a doctor or a qualified professional.