Pre-Suasion: What Comes First Matters
Practical ways to use pre-suasion, the idea that what comes first in a conversation shapes what follows.
The moment before the message matters. Set the scene kindly.
10 tips that really help
These ideas come from Influence (Robert Cialdini), Pre-Suasion (Robert Cialdini), Thinking, Fast and Slow (Daniel Kahneman), and everyday practice. The first six help the most. Pick one and try it today.
What comes first shapes what follows
The mood and ideas introduced before your pitch influence how the pitch is received.
Plan the lead-up.
Set a positive tone
Start meetings with warmth and appreciation to prepare an open mind.
Begin with thanks.
Ask about their successes first
Recalling achievements puts people in a confident, receptive state.
Start with a win.
Prepare the environment
A comfortable setting and clear materials set the stage.
Check the room.
Use relevant words early
Introduce concepts like trust or growth before your offer.
Choose words.
Share a short relevant story first
A story primes the mindset you want.
Prepare one.
Avoid negative openings
Complaints at the start colour everything.
Stay positive.
Ask questions that point to need
Questions about challenges prepare them to see your solution.
Plan them.
Be honest about intent
Priming should help, not trick.
Be transparent.
The idea
Robert Cialdini’s book Pre-Suasion explains how focus before a message shapes response.
Read about it.
Easy things to say
When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many sales conversations.
“Before we start, how are you finding the day?”
“Many owners tell me their biggest wish is more time.”
“Let us talk about how to get some back.”
“Is that right for you?”
“(Set a warm tone.)”
“Thank you.”
Your first week
One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.
Plan your first minute
Choose a positive frame
Ask a question that gets a yes
Create a comfortable setting
Avoid negative openings
Notice the effect
Review
Further reading
- Influence (Robert Cialdini)
- Pre-Suasion (Robert Cialdini)
- Thinking, Fast and Slow (Daniel Kahneman)
The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.
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Start freeThese lessons share general learning and everyday ideas. They are not medical or mental health advice. If you feel very anxious, low or unwell, please talk to a doctor or a qualified professional.
More lessons in “Why People Buy”
Keep going. Small steps every day make a big change.
← Previous: Why People Hate ChangeNext: Frame Your Offer Positively →
- Reciprocity: Give First
- Commitment: Start Small
- Social Proof: People Follow People
- Authority: Show Your Expertise
- Liking: Be Someone People Enjoy
- Scarcity: Real Limits, Honest Deadlines
- Unity: Be Part of Their Tribe
- People Buy With Feelings, Justify With Facts
- The Two Minds of Every Buyer
- Why Choice Overload Freezes People
- Anchoring: Why the First Number Matters
- The Fear of Missing Out
- Loss Hurts More Than Gain Feels Good
- Why People Hate Change
- Pre-Suasion: What Comes First Matters
- Frame Your Offer Positively
- Ask Small Questions That Say Yes
- Use Reassuring Words
- Choose Your Moment
- Create a Comfortable Environment
- Start With Common Ground
- The Line Between Persuading and Pushing
- Never Fake Scarcity
- Use Social Proof Honestly
- Be Transparent About Trade-offs
- Persuade With Their Interests, Not Yours
- Why Honest Sellers Win Long Term
- The Newspaper Test
- Offer Clear Defaults
- Cut the Number of Options
- Show the Next Step Plainly
- Reduce Risk With Guarantees
- Offer a Small First Step
- Remove Hidden Hassles
- The Analytical Buyer
- The Quick-Decision Buyer
- The Relationship Buyer
- The Cautious Buyer
- Buying for a Team vs Buying Alone
- Adapt Your Style in Minutes
