LESSON 35 · HOW TO MEET NEW PEOPLE
The One-New-Person-a-Week Goal
Twelve ways to meet one new person a week, a goal small enough to keep and big enough to change your life.
Fifty-two new people a year is a lot of friends in the making. It starts with one a week.
33 tipsEasy things to say7-day plan
33 tips that really help
These ideas come from Platonic (Marisa Franco), Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi), How to Talk to Anyone (Leil Lowndes), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.
TIP 1
Make the goal simple
One new person a week is easy to remember and doable even on a busy week.
TRY THIS
Write your goal on a sticky note.
TIP 2
Pick a regular day
Choosing Thursdays or Saturdays turns it into a habit.
TRY THIS
Mark the day in your calendar.
TIP 3
Choose likely places
Classes, cafes, events and online groups give plenty of people.
TRY THIS
List three places for this month.
TIP 4
Learn a name and a fact
It makes the next hello easy and warm.
TRY THIS
Write both in your notes.
TIP 5
Count any real chat
A two-minute talk with a new name counts. Do not set the bar too high.
TRY THIS
Decide what counts.
TIP 6
Follow up when you can
A message or hello next time strengthens the link.
TRY THIS
Send one follow-up this week.
TIP 7
Add variety
Meet different types of people for a richer circle.
TRY THIS
Try a new setting each month.
TIP 8
Share the goal
Tell a friend so they can cheer you on.
TRY THIS
Message a friend your goal.
TIP 9
Allow quiet weeks
If a week is hard, aim for a hello.
TRY THIS
Keep a smaller backup goal.
TIP 10
Review monthly
See who became a friend and who did not. Spend time where it feels good.
TRY THIS
Review at month end.
TIP 11
Script: introducing yourself with a goal
Say I am trying to meet one new person a week, and today it is you. It is honest, light and often makes people smile.
TIP 12
Script: asking someone to coffee
After a good chat, say I have enjoyed talking, would you like to grab a coffee sometime? Offer a day.
TRY THIS
Ask once this week.
TIP 13
Script: asking for contact details
Say I would love to continue this chat, can I get your number? Keep it friendly.
TIP 14
Mistake: counting only deep conversations
A two-minute chat counts. Setting the bar too high leads to quitting.
TRY THIS
Decide what counts.
TIP 15
Mistake: forgetting the follow-up
Meeting someone once rarely creates a friendship. A short message does.
TRY THIS
Message within two days.
TIP 16
If your week is too busy
Aim for a hello rather than skipping altogether. Keep the habit alive.
TRY THIS
Do a minimal version.
TIP 17
If you meet no one new
Change the place or time. Different settings bring different people.
TRY THIS
Try a new setting.
TIP 18
If you feel shy
Start with people in service roles or in classes. Build up slowly.
TRY THIS
Choose an easy setting.
TIP 19
If you feel rejected
One cool response is not a pattern. Try again next week.
TIP 20
Drill: a monthly tally
Count the new people at month end. Seeing the number grows motivation.
TIP 21
Drill: four types of place
Meet one person in a class, one at a cafe, one at an event and one online. Variety widens your circle.
TIP 22
Drill: meet someone older or younger
Different ages bring fresh views. Include them.
TIP 23
Use your workplace
A colleague you barely know counts. Ask them about their weekend.
TIP 24
Use your neighbourhood
Neighbours are new people too. Say hello at the door.
TIP 25
Use hobbies
A person at your hobby group you have not met counts. Say hello.
TRY THIS
Introduce yourself.
TIP 26
Use friends
Ask a friend to introduce you. It is the easiest way.
TIP 27
Use community events
Fairs and markets are full of new faces. Go.
TIP 28
Use online groups
Join a local group and meet one person in person. Be safe.
TIP 29
Write it down
A note of names and details helps. Keep it simple.
TIP 30
Share your goal
Tell a friend, who may introduce you to someone. Accountability helps.
TIP 31
Celebrate week four
After four weeks, celebrate. You met four people.
TIP 32
Review at month end
Which meetings felt best? Do more of those.
TRY THIS
Write three lines.
TIP 33
Keep it going
One a week is easy to keep. Continue.
Easy things to say
When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many everyday friendships.
HELLO
“Hi, I do not think we have met, I am Sam.”
SHARE
“I am trying to meet one new person each week.”
FOLLOW
“It was great to meet you, shall we chat again?”
CLOSE
“Enjoy the rest of your day.”
Your first week
One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.
DAY 1
Decide your weekly day
DAY 2
Pick a place to meet someone
DAY 3
Introduce yourself to one new person
DAY 4
Learn one fact about them
DAY 6
Send a friendly follow-up if you can
DAY 7
Plan next week’s person
Further reading
- Platonic (Marisa Franco)
- Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi)
- How to Talk to Anyone (Leil Lowndes)
The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.
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Start freeThese lessons share general learning and everyday ideas. They are not medical or mental health advice. If you feel very anxious, low or unwell, please talk to a doctor or a qualified professional.