Make Friends in Another Country
Twelve ways to make friends in another country, when language and culture are new.
Being a foreigner can feel lonely. It can also be a doorway to wonderful friendships.
32 tips that really help
These ideas come from Platonic (Marisa Franco), Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi), How to Talk to Anyone (Leil Lowndes), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.
Learn the basics
A few phrases in the local language show respect and open doors. People often warm up quickly to the effort.
Learn five greetings.
Join a language exchange
In a language exchange, two people swap their languages and often become friends. It is a very common route.
Search for one near you.
Join expat and newcomer groups
Others share your experience and can give tips and company. They are a good first community.
Find a local expat group.
Make local friends too
Locals can show you hidden places and customs. Join a local club or class.
Join one local club.
Share your culture
Cook a dish or tell a story from your home country. Curiosity builds friendship.
Invite someone to taste your food.
Be curious about theirs
Ask about festivals, food and traditions. People enjoy sharing their culture with interested newcomers.
Ask one question about local customs.
Be patient with the language
Mistakes are part of learning, so laugh and keep trying. Most people appreciate your effort.
Say it is okay to make mistakes.
Take a language class
Classmates share your goals and often become friends. Classes give a regular schedule.
Sign up for one.
Respect local customs
Learn greeting styles and social rules so you feel at ease. A short guide helps.
Read one short etiquette guide.
Stay connected to home
Calls with family and friends ease homesickness and keep you steady as you build a new life.
Call someone weekly.
Script: asking for a language swap
Say I am learning your language and I can help you with mine, would you like to practise together? It is a fair and warm offer.
Use it with one person.
Script: introducing yourself
Try Hello, I am Sam, I am new here and I am learning the language. People are usually kind and helpful.
Practise it aloud.
Script: asking about food
Ask what dish from here should I try first? It invites a story and a recommendation.
Ask a local.
Mistake: only mixing with people from home
Familiar company is comforting but slows your integration. Aim for a balance.
Join one local activity.
Mistake: waiting until your language is perfect
Friendships form with imperfect language. Speak anyway.
Say one sentence today.
If you feel lost with customs
Ask a friendly local what the usual way is. They will usually enjoy explaining.
Ask a question.
If you feel homesick
Call home weekly, and also build small rituals in your new place. Both help.
Schedule your call.
If you meet prejudice
Not everyone will be welcoming. Seek out groups that are open and kind.
Find one welcoming group.
If paperwork is stressing you
Community centres and expat groups can help. Ask for support.
Look for one.
Drill: five phrases a week
Learn five new phrases a week and use them. Progress shows quickly.
Write five.
Drill: one local per week
Talk to one local each week for a month. Small steps count.
Choose a place.
Join a cooking class
Local cooking classes teach the language and culture while you meet people. Book one.
Search.
Join a choir or sports club
Music and sport cross language barriers. Many clubs welcome newcomers.
Try one.
Volunteer locally
Helping a local charity connects you to people and language. Offer a few hours.
Sign up.
Visit a local library
Libraries have language groups and events. Ask at the desk.
Visit this week.
Attend a festival
Festivals show the culture and gather locals. Go with an open mind.
Mark one.
Invite someone for a meal
Sharing food is a global language. Invite a neighbour.
Plan it.
Share your culture
Cook something from home and share. People enjoy it.
Plan one dish.
Use apps to find groups
Language and meetup apps list events. Check them.
Download one.
Join online expat communities
They give advice and friends. Be kind and helpful.
Join one.
Learn local etiquette
Small gestures show respect. Read a short guide.
Read one.
Be kind to yourself
Adjustment takes time. Rest and celebrate small wins.
Say well done.
Easy things to say
When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many everyday friendships.
“Hello, I am learning the language, can you help me?”
“What food do you recommend?”
“In my country we do it differently, and I love learning yours.”
“Would you like to try a language exchange?”
“Thank you for your patience.”
“Shall we meet again next week?”
Your first week
One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.
Learn five key phrases
Join a language exchange
Attend an expat or local meet-up
Ask a neighbour for a tip
Try local food with someone
Share a dish from your country
Review your week
Further reading
- Platonic (Marisa Franco)
- Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi)
- How to Talk to Anyone (Leil Lowndes)
The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.
More lessons in “How to Meet New People”
Keep going. Small steps every day make a big change.
← Previous: Make Friends as a New ParentNext: The One-New-Person-a-Week Goal →
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- Drop the "Nobody Likes Me" Story
- It Takes Fifty Hours, and That Is Okay
- You Do Not Need Many Friends, Just Good Ones
- Decide What Kind of Friends You Want
- Expect Awkward, Keep Going
- Choose Places Where You See the Same Faces
- Classes, Clubs and Courses That Work
- Make Your Neighbourhood Your Network
- Meet People Through Volunteering
- Use Your Workplace Without Pressure
- Find Friends in Your Faith or Community
- Make a Weekly Rhythm of Rooms
- Ask Friends to Introduce You
- Say Yes to Every Invitation for a Month
- Be a Plus-One With Purpose
- Turn One Friend Into Five
- Reconnect With Old Friends First
- Meet the Friends of Friends
- Go Where Your Friends Go
- The Café, the Gym and the Queue
- Turn Regulars Into Real Friends
- Dog Parks and Other Natural Meeting Places
- Say Hello Daily to Three People
- Make Friends Through Hobbies
- Walking Groups and Running Clubs
- Use Public Events to Meet Locals
- Moving to a New City: Your First Month Plan
- Meet People as a Newcomer
- Make Friends at University or College
- Make Friends After Retirement
- Make Friends as a New Parent
- Make Friends in Another Country
- The One-New-Person-a-Week Goal
- Track Your Social Attempts Kindly
- Say Yes More, Cancel Less
- Be Patient: Friendship Takes Repetition
- Celebrate Each Small Connection
- Your Meeting-People Plan
