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Sales Skills / The Confident Seller / Lesson 24
LESSON 24 · THE CONFIDENT SELLER

See Your Customer as a Real Person

Forty ways to see each customer as a real person, with hopes, worries and a story of their own.

Behind every account is a person. Curiosity about people is a sales skill.

14 tipsEasy things to say7-day plan
Start with tip 1
Jump to the 7-day plan

14 tips that really help

These ideas come from The Psychology of Selling (Brian Tracy), Secrets of Closing the Sale (Zig Ziglar), To Sell Is Human (Daniel Pink), and everyday practice. The first six help the most. Pick one and try it today.

Photo for the tip: People, not accounts
TIP 1

People, not accounts

Names and numbers can hide the human. Remember a real person sits behind each record.

TRY THIS
Write one customer’s story in a few lines.
Photo for the tip: Ask how they started
TIP 2

Ask how they started

Many people enjoy telling how they got into their work.

TRY THIS
Ask “How did you get started?”
Photo for the tip: Ask about their goals
TIP 3

Ask about their goals

Hopes show what matters most.

TRY THIS
Ask “What are you hoping to achieve this year?”
Photo for the tip: Ask about their worries
TIP 4

Ask about their worries

Concerns tell you where to help.

TRY THIS
Ask “What worries you most right now?”
Photo for the tip: Ask about their team
TIP 5

Ask about their team

Work is social. Learn who they work with.

TRY THIS
Ask who else is involved.
Photo for the tip: Ask about their interests
TIP 6

Ask about their interests

A shared hobby builds real rapport.

TRY THIS
Ask how they spend weekends.
Photo for the tip: Notice their surroundings
TIP 7

Notice their surroundings

Photos and books tell stories.

TRY THIS
Comment kindly on one item.
Photo for the tip: Keep a simple notes file
TIP 8

Keep a simple notes file

A short record helps you care consistently.

TRY THIS
Update it after each call.
Photo for the tip: Read their profile
TIP 9

Read their profile

Knowing their background shows respect.

TRY THIS
Spend five minutes before a call.
Photo for the tip: Send a card
TIP 10

Send a card

A personal touch stands out.

TRY THIS
Write one by hand.
Photo for the tip: See their pressure
TIP 11

See their pressure

Bosses and deadlines weigh on them.

TRY THIS
Ask about timing.
Photo for the tip: Be curious
TIP 12

Be curious

Follow up on what they say.

TRY THIS
Say “Tell me more.”
Photo for the tip: Be genuine
TIP 13

Be genuine

Real is better than polished.

TRY THIS
Skip the script.
Photo for the tip: Avoid labels
TIP 14

Avoid labels

They are more than a lead.

TRY THIS
Use their name.

Easy things to say

When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many sales conversations.

CURIOUS

“How did you get into this work?”

WARM

“How is your week going?”

INTEREST

“Do you have plans for the weekend?”

GOAL

“What are you hoping for this year?”

THANKS

“Thank you for sharing that.”

CARE

“I will remember that.”

Your first week

One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.

DAY 1
Ask one friendly personal question
DAY 2
Remember one detail
DAY 3
Write notes after a call
DAY 4
Say their name warmly
DAY 5
Send a kind message
DAY 6
Celebrate a milestone
DAY 7
Review your notes

Further reading

  • The Psychology of Selling (Brian Tracy)
  • Secrets of Closing the Sale (Zig Ziglar)
  • To Sell Is Human (Daniel Pink)

The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.

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These lessons share general learning and everyday ideas. They are not medical or mental health advice. If you feel very anxious, low or unwell, please talk to a doctor or a qualified professional.

More lessons in “The Confident Seller”

Keep going. Small steps every day make a big change.

← Previous: The Giver's EdgeNext: Your Job Is to Solve, Not to Push →

  1. You Are Already a Salesperson
  2. Throw Away the Pushy Salesman Picture
  3. Believe in What You Sell
  4. Silence Your Inner Critic
  5. Your First 90 Seconds of Courage
  6. Borrow Confidence You Do Not Feel Yet
  7. Celebrate the Small Win Every Day
  8. Why "No" Is Not About You
  9. The Rejection Reset in 60 Seconds
  10. Turn Every No Into a Lesson
  11. Ask for Feedback Without Fear
  12. The Numbers Game Made Simple
  13. Bounce Back After a Bad Call
  14. Why Great Sellers Hear Thousands of Noes
  15. Breathe Away Pre-Call Panic
  16. Your Pre-Meeting Ritual
  17. Stand Like Someone Worth Hearing
  18. The Power Pose Myth and What Really Helps
  19. Sound Calm When You Feel Shaky
  20. What to Do When Your Mind Goes Blank
  21. Speak Slower, Sell Better
  22. Sell to Serve, Not to Impress
  23. The Giver's Edge
  24. See Your Customer as a Real Person
  25. Your Job Is to Solve, Not to Push
  26. Be Proud of the Value You Bring
  27. Lead With Honesty Every Time
  28. The Quiet Power of Integrity
  29. Start Your Day Like a Pro
  30. Set Goals You Can Actually Hit
  31. The Two-Minute Daily Review
  32. Read, Listen, Learn: 15 Minutes a Day
  33. Find a Mentor Who Pushes You
  34. Say Your Wins Out Loud
  35. Survive Your First Sales Slump
  36. Protect Your Energy Like Money
  37. When Sales Are Slow, Do This
  38. Stay Hopeful in a Long Sales Cycle
  39. Turn Pressure Into Focus
  40. Become the Seller You Admire
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