Networking & Career / Finding Mentors and Allies / Lesson 12

LESSON 12 · FINDING MENTORS AND ALLIES

Become a Mentor Yourself

Eighteen easy tips to become a mentor yourself, so you pass on what you know and grow too.

You have something to give. Mentoring helps both.

27 tipsEasy things to say7-day plan

Start with tip 1

Jump to the 7-day plan

27 tips that really help

These ideas come from Radical Candor (Kim Scott), Give and Take (Adam Grant), Designing Your Life (Bill Burnett and Dave Evans), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.

TIP 1

Why mentor

Mentoring helps others and also deepens your own understanding. It also builds your reputation as a kind leader.

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Start.

TIP 2

You do not need to be an expert

If you are a step ahead, you can help someone behind. Share what you learned.

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Share it.

TIP 3

Pick what you can share

List the skills and lessons you can offer. Focus on a few.

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List three.

TIP 4

Find someone to support

Look in your workplace, school or community. Many people need a guide.

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Find one.

TIP 5

Set a simple time rhythm

Meet once a month for thirty minutes. Clear limits protect energy.

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Set a rhythm.

TIP 6

Listen before advising

Ask about their goals and fears. Understanding comes first.

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Listen.

TIP 7

Share your stories

Tell your mistakes and lessons. Real stories help.

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Share a story.

TIP 8

Encourage and believe in them

Kind words matter. Many people need to hear that they can do it.

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Encourage.

TIP 9

Script: offer

I would be glad to share what I have learned if it helps. Say it warmly.

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Use it.

TIP 10

Script: listening

What do you hope to achieve this year? Say it kindly.

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Use it.

TIP 11

Script: encouraging

I believe you can do this, and I am here to help. Say it sincerely.

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Use it.

TIP 12

Mistake: telling people what to do

Guide, do not command, so offer ideas.

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Offer ideas.

TIP 13

Mistake: making it about you

Keep the focus on them, so listen.

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Listen.

TIP 14

Mistake: promising too much

Be clear about your time, so set limits.

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Set limits.

TIP 15

Troubleshoot: when you feel unqualified

Share honest experience and say what you do not know. Humility helps.

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Be honest.

TIP 16

Troubleshoot: when they stop responding

Send a kind message and let them lead. People have seasons.

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Stay kind.

TIP 17

Drill: offer help to one person

Offer thirty minutes to one person this month.

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Offer it.

TIP 18

Drill: write what you could teach

Write five things you could teach someone.

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Write five.

TIP 19

Start with one person

One mentee is enough to learn the skill.

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Offer to one.

TIP 20

Meet for thirty minutes monthly

A small rhythm is easy to keep.

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Set a rhythm.

TIP 21

Example: the first mentee

Lina met a new colleague monthly. She learned how to lead as she mentored.

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Offer a chat.

TIP 22

Example: the volunteer mentor

Joe mentored a student through a free program and felt proud.

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Look for programs.

TIP 23

Troubleshoot: when they do not follow your advice

It is their path. Offer support and keep kind.

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Stay kind.

TIP 24

Drill: write your mentor offer

Write two lines for how you can help.

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Write it.

TIP 25

Remember how nervous you once felt

Recalling your own early days helps you listen with patience and kindness to someone new.

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Write one memory.

TIP 26

Offer a small, clear way to help first

Saying I can review your CV for twenty minutes is easier to accept than a vague offer of mentoring.

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Offer one thing.

TIP 27

Ask your mentee to share one goal each month

A goal gives each meeting a purpose, and it helps both of you see progress over time.

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Ask for a goal.

Easy things to say

When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many networking and career moments.

OFFER

“I can share what I learned.”

LISTEN

“Tell me about your goals.”

GUIDE

“Here is one idea.”

CARE

“I believe in you.”

LIMIT

“I can meet once a month.”

CLOSE

“Proud of you.”

Your first week

One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.

DAY 1
Pick your strengths

DAY 2
Find a mentee

DAY 3
Set the time

DAY 4
Listen first

DAY 5
Share stories

DAY 6
Encourage

DAY 7
Reflect

Further reading

• Radical Candor (Kim Scott)
• Give and Take (Adam Grant)
• Designing Your Life (Bill Burnett and Dave Evans)

The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.

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These lessons share general learning and everyday ideas. They are not medical or mental health advice. If you feel very anxious, low or unwell, please talk to a doctor or a qualified professional.