Start With Why It Matters
Thirty-two easy ways to start with why it matters, because people listen when they know the point is for them.
Start with why. Then they care.
40 tips that really help
These ideas come from The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking (Dale Carnegie), Talk Like TED (Carmine Gallo), Made to Stick (Chip and Dan Heath), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.
Start with why it matters
People listen when they care. Opening with why your message matters to them gives them a reason to pay attention before you give any details.
Write one sentence that begins “This matters because…”
The golden circle
In his 2009 TED talk, Simon Sinek described a pattern, Why, How, What, and argued that leaders who start with why inspire more action. It remains one of the most-watched talks.
Watch five minutes of the talk for ideas.
Put the listener first
Ask, “Why should they care?” before you begin. Their reason matters more than yours.
Write what your audience gains.
Use a human reason
“This will save you an hour a week” is a human reason. People respond to benefits in their own lives.
Translate a feature into a benefit.
Name the problem
“Many of us waste time in meetings.” Naming a shared problem opens listeners’ minds.
State a problem in one sentence.
Name the stakes
What happens if nothing changes? Gentle stakes create interest without scaring.
Say what is at risk.
Name the hope
What could be better? Paint a picture of a better outcome.
Describe the improved future in a line.
Use a question
“What if every meeting finished early?” A question makes people think of their own reasons.
Open with a what-if.
Use a story
A short story that shows why something matters is powerful. Pick a real case.
Tell a ten-second story of impact.
Use a surprising fact
A fact that shows importance, such as “We spend six hours a week in meetings”, grabs attention.
Find one accurate stat.
Use a quote
A short, relevant quote can frame why. Keep it brief and credited.
Choose a line you love.
Say it in your own words
Authentic reasons beat polished ones. Speak from what matters to you.
Tell why you care.
Share your personal why
A brief personal reason builds trust: “I care because I once missed a deadline and it cost us.” Honesty connects.
Write your personal why.
Link to their why
Connect your message to your listener’s goals. “You said you want more time.”
Name a goal they have.
Keep it short
The why should take under thirty seconds. Then move on.
Time your opening.
Do not delay the point
Do not let your why become a long preface. Give it quickly and get to the point.
Cut your intro by half.
Check it is true
Do not exaggerate. Honest reasons last.
Check your claims.
Match the audience
Executives may care about cost, teams about workload. Tailor your why.
Choose the right why for the group.
Match the moment
Is it urgent? Say so. If not, say why now.
Explain the timing.
Use for emails
Open with why you are writing. “I am writing because the deadline moved.”
Add a why line.
Use for meetings
Start with why the meeting matters. It sets focus.
State the purpose.
Use for requests
“Could you help with this? It would let us finish early.” A reason makes people more willing, as in Cialdini’s research on giving reasons.
Add a reason to a request.
Use for feedback
Explain why the feedback matters. It reduces defensiveness.
Say why you are sharing it.
Use for apologies
Say why you are sorry and why it matters to you. Sincerity grows.
Explain what you understand.
Use for change
People resist change without a reason. Give a clear why.
Explain why change is needed.
Use for goals
Share why a goal matters. It motivates.
Write your goal’s why.
Use for teaching
Explain why a skill matters before teaching it. Students engage more.
Start a lesson with why.
Use for selling
Sell the why, not just the product. People buy meaning.
Write a why-first pitch.
Use for fundraising
People give to causes with a clear why. Tell the story of need.
Write a one-line cause statement.
Use for interviews
Explain why you want the job. It shows genuine interest.
Prepare your why for the role.
Use for toasts
Say why you are honouring someone. It touches hearts.
Open with why they matter.
Use for speeches
Start with a why that moves. Then how and what follow.
Draft your why first.
Use for life
Knowing your why helps you speak with purpose. Reflect on it.
Write what matters to you.
Ask others why
Curiosity about others’ reasons builds understanding. Ask warmly.
Ask someone, “What matters most to you here?”
Listen to their why
Understanding their reasons helps you tailor your message.
Listen before you speak.
Refresh your why
Reasons evolve. Review yours often.
Revisit your why each month.
Keep it positive
Lead with hope, not fear. Positive reasons sustain.
Rewrite your why positively.
Celebrate purpose
When listeners lean in, you know your why landed.
Note when people engage.
Ask "so what?" for your listener
After you state your reason, imagine the listener asking “so what?” and answer it in one more sentence. If you cannot answer, the reason is not strong enough yet.
Add a “which means…” sentence after your next reason.
Give the why before the how
People accept a plan more readily when they understand the reason first. Reversing the order, with the steps coming before the reason, often creates confusion and push-back.
Reorder one explanation so the reason comes first.
Easy things to say
When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many everyday situations.
“This matters because it saves you time.â€
“The reason this is important is…â€
“It affects all of us.â€
“By the end you will know how to do it.â€
“Thanks for listening.â€
“That is why it matters.â€
Your first week
One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.
Know your listener
Find the why
Say it first
Link to their life
Promise a benefit
Keep it short
Deliver
Further reading
- The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking (Dale Carnegie)
- Talk Like TED (Carmine Gallo)
- Made to Stick (Chip and Dan Heath)
The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.
More lessons in “Speaking Clearly”
Keep going. Small steps every day make a big change.
← Previous: The Rule of ThreeNext: Tell a Short Story Instead →
- Slow Down by Ten Percent
- Speak From Your Belly, Not Your Throat
- The Magic of the Pause
- End Sentences Like You Mean Them
- Warm Up Your Voice in One Minute
- Find Your Natural Volume
- Vary Your Tone to Keep Attention
- Use Words a Ten-Year-Old Would Understand
- Short Sentences Sound Confident
- Cut Jargon and Filler Words
- Lead With Your Main Point
- Say One Idea at a Time
- Replace Vague Words With Exact Ones
- Read Your Words Out Loud First
- Open Your Mouth and Speak Clearly
- Stop Mumbling in Three Steps
- Pronounce Hard Words With Confidence
- Breathe at the Right Moments
- Speak Clearly on the Phone
- Speak Clearly on Video Calls
- Handle an Accent With Pride
- The Point, Reason, Example Formula
- The Rule of Three
- Start With Why It Matters
- Tell a Short Story Instead
- Use Numbers and Pictures Wisely
- Finish With One Clear Takeaway
- Answer a Question in Thirty Seconds
- Replace Um With a Silent Pause
- What to Do When You Lose Your Thought
- Recover From a Mistake Smoothly
- Stop Over-Explaining
- Stop Apologising Before You Speak
- Practise With a Voice Recorder
- Stay Clear When You Are Nervous
- Speak Clearly When Put on the Spot
- Explain Something Complicated Simply
- Speak Clearly in an Argument
- Speak Clearly to Someone Senior
- Your Daily Clarity Habit
