Stand Tall and Feel Strong
Twenty small body habits that make you feel strong, from a tall spine and easy walk to a one-minute morning routine.
Tall and soft. Standing well helps you feel well.
20 tips that really help
These ideas come from Mindset (Carol Dweck), Self-Compassion (Kristin Neff), Chatter (Ethan Kross), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.
Sit and stand with a long spine
Imagine a gentle string pulling the top of your head toward the ceiling. Let your back grow long, your shoulders drop and your chest feel open. This is the simplest posture for confidence, and it costs nothing.
Set a gentle reminder three times a day. When it rings, lift your spine, drop your shoulders and take one slow breath. Do it for one week.
Open the front of your body
Many of us curl forward when we work or feel unsure. Try opening your chest by letting your arms rest at your sides and your hands stay uncrossed. Imagine a small smile in your chest. Open up, and breathe.
Check your arms and chest three times today. If you are folded, unfold gently. Notice how your breathing changes.
Try the two-minute reset, and be honest about it
Before a big moment, stand in a space where nobody is watching. Stand tall, feet apart, hands relaxed or on your hips, and breathe slowly for two minutes. You will probably feel a little more ready and a little more powerful.
Try the reset before your next challenge. Stand tall, breathe slowly for two minutes and say, I am ready for this. Notice how you feel, without expecting miracles.
Walk like you have somewhere good to go
The way you walk shows how you feel, and it can also change how you feel. Walk with a steady pace, an easy swing of your arms and your eyes looking ahead.
On your next walk, try a confident gait. Look ahead, swing your arms and take full steps. Do it for five minutes and notice your mood.
Wear what makes you feel like yourself
Clothes can change how you think and feel. Choose an outfit that is comfortable, fits well and makes you feel like the best version of yourself. It does not need to be expensive or fashionable. It needs to feel right.
Choose a favourite outfit for your next big day. Try it on the day before so you can feel comfortable in it.
Warm up your body before big moments
Athletes warm up before they play, and so can you. Before a talk or meeting, roll your shoulders, shake out your hands and stretch your neck gently. Take a short walk or climb a flight of stairs.
Make a one-minute warm-up routine you can do in any place. Include shoulder rolls, hand shakes and a deep breath. Use it before the next challenge.
Sit with your back in the chair and feet on the floor
When you sit, let your back rest against the chair and place both feet flat on the floor. Let your hands rest on your lap or on the table. Sit up, but do not stiffen.
Check how you are sitting right now. Adjust to feet flat, back supported and shoulders soft. Do the same in your next meeting.
Take a stretch break every hour
Long hours at a desk make us slump. Every hour, stand up, reach your arms overhead and stretch for thirty seconds. Roll your shoulders and look out of a window. Your mind and your posture will thank you.
Set an hourly alarm for one work day. Each time it rings, stand, stretch and take one slow breath. Notice how you feel at the end of the day.
Look at the horizon
When your head hangs down, your mood often sinks too. Lift your eyes to the level of the horizon, and look at what is ahead of you. Do it on a walk, in a queue or at the window.
On your next walk, keep your eyes at the level of the horizon for five minutes. Leave your phone in your pocket. Notice how your mood changes.
Check yourself in a mirror, kindly
Once a day, look at yourself in a mirror for ten seconds. Notice your posture and your face, and say something kind. I am doing my best, or, I am glad to see you.
Tomorrow morning, look in the mirror, check your posture and say one kind sentence to yourself. Do it for a week.
Move your body three times a week
Regular exercise is one of the best ways to feel strong. Choose something you enjoy, such as a brisk walk, a dance, swimming or cycling. Aim for thirty minutes, three times a week, or start with ten.
Choose one form of movement you enjoy. Book three sessions into your week, even if they are short. Tick them off on a calendar.
Stand evenly on both feet
Many of us lean on one leg or shift from side to side when we feel nervous. Try standing with your weight spread evenly on both feet, feet about hip-width apart. Imagine roots growing from your soles.
The next time you stand to talk, check your feet. Spread your weight evenly and keep still for a moment. Notice how your voice changes.
Slow down your movements
When we are nervous, we hurry. Our hands fidget, our steps quicken and we turn quickly. Slow down your movements by about a quarter. Reach for a cup slowly. Turn your head with care. Slow movements signal calm.
For one afternoon, move at three-quarter speed. Notice how your breathing and your thoughts respond. Keep this pace in your next meeting.
Use a short ritual before a hard moment
Create a small routine you do before big moments. It might be a deep breath, a stretch, a sip of water and a sentence you say to yourself. Do it in the same order each time.
Design your own four-step ritual. Practise it twice this week before ordinary tasks. Then use it before something that matters.
Play a song that lifts you
Music can change your mood in minutes. Make a short playlist of songs that make you feel strong, calm or happy, and play it before a nervous moment. Listen with headphones on the way, or in the car.
Make a five-song playlist called Ready. Choose songs that lift you without making you too wired. Play it the next time you need a boost.
Imagine a string lifting your head
Here is a simple picture to use any time. Imagine a thin string attached to the top of your head, gently lifting you up. Let your neck grow long and your chin settle level.
Try the string image three times today. Hold it for a few breaths each time. Notice how your neck and shoulders feel.
Notice when you shrink, and grow again
Pay attention to the moments when you make yourself small, such as when you cross your arms, drop your head or turn away. Then gently grow again. You do not need to scold yourself. Just notice and adjust.
Tomorrow, watch for three moments when you shrink. Each time, take a breath and stand or sit a little taller. Count your corrections.
Care for your body like a friend would
Eat regular meals, drink water and get enough sleep. Take care of your body like you would a close friend. A well-looked-after body feels stronger and calmer. It also sends the message that you matter.
Choose one self-care habit to start this week, like drinking a glass of water when you wake up. Keep it small and do it every day.
Smile at yourself in the doorway
Before you go into a room, take a moment and give yourself a small smile. It is a private pep talk, and no one will see it. Add a kind thought, like, I can do this. Then walk through.
For one week, give yourself a small smile and a kind thought at every door you enter. Notice the effect on your day.
Build a sixty-second morning routine
Start your day with a short body routine. Stand tall, stretch your arms, take three slow breaths and smile. Do it right after you get up, or right after you brush your teeth. One minute is plenty.
Choose an anchor in your morning, like brushing your teeth. Add the sixty-second routine right after it. Do it for fourteen days and see how you feel.
Easy things to say
When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many everyday moments.
“I am ready for this.”
“You look ready. Good luck today.”
“I belong here.”
“Slow in, slow out.”
“I can feel my feet on the floor.”
“Thank you for waiting.”
Your first week
One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.
Lift your spine three times today
Walk for five minutes with your head up
Open your arms and chest
Stretch once every hour
Look at the horizon for a while
Try a one-minute morning routine
Move your body for thirty minutes
Further reading
- Mindset (Carol Dweck)
- Self-Compassion (Kristin Neff)
- Chatter (Ethan Kross)
The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.
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Start freeThese lessons share general learning and everyday ideas. They are not medical or mental health advice. If you feel very anxious, low or unwell, please talk to a doctor or a qualified professional.
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