Networking & Career / Giving Before Asking / Lesson 09

LESSON 09 · GIVING BEFORE ASKING

Say Thank You Properly

Eighteen easy tips to say thank you properly, so people feel valued and want to help you again.

Thank people warmly. Be specific.

25 tipsEasy things to say7-day plan

Start with tip 1

Jump to the 7-day plan

25 tips that really help

These ideas come from Give and Take (Adam Grant), The Go-Giver (Bob Burg and John David Mann), Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.

TIP 1

Why thank you matters

A warm thank you makes people feel valued. It also makes them glad to help you again.

TRY THIS
Say it.

TIP 2

Say thank you quickly

Thank people within a day. Fast thanks feels sincere.

TRY THIS
Send it today.

TIP 3

Name what they did

Say, your advice on my CV helped me get an interview. Specific thanks feels real.

TRY THIS
Be specific.

TIP 4

Share the result

Tell them what happened because of their help. Results make them proud.

TRY THIS
Share one.

TIP 5

Write a short note

A handwritten card or kind message stands out. Short is fine.

TRY THIS
Write one.

TIP 6

Say it in person if you can

A smile and a warm voice carry more care than text.

TRY THIS
Say it face to face.

TIP 7

Add a small gift if suitable

A coffee or a book can show care. Keep it small and thoughtful.

TRY THIS
Think of one.

TIP 8

Offer to help back

Say, let me know how I can help you. Giving back keeps balance.

TRY THIS
Offer back.

TIP 9

Script: simple thanks

Thank you so much for your time today. Say it warmly.

TRY THIS
Use it.

TIP 10

Script: specific thanks

Your tip about asking for feedback helped me a lot. Say it clearly.

TRY THIS
Use it.

TIP 11

Script: result thanks

I got the interview, thanks to your advice. Say it happily.

TRY THIS
Use it.

TIP 12

Mistake: sending a generic thank you

Generic thanks feel empty, so add one detail.

TRY THIS
Add detail.

TIP 13

Mistake: thanking too late

Late thanks lose warmth, so be quick.

TRY THIS
Be quick.

TIP 14

Troubleshoot: when you feel awkward

Keep it short and sincere. A simple message is enough.

TRY THIS
Keep simple.

TIP 15

Troubleshoot: when you cannot give a gift

Words and results are gifts too. Tell your story.

TRY THIS
Use words.

TIP 16

Drill: write three thank-you notes

Write thank-you notes to three people who helped you this year.

TRY THIS
Write three.

TIP 17

Drill: send one today

Send one thank-you message today and notice how it feels.

TRY THIS
Send one.

TIP 18

Say what the help made possible

Your tip helped me finish my report on time. Results make thanks real.

TRY THIS
Name the result.

TIP 19

Mention the effort they made

Thank you for taking time out of your busy day. Effort matters.

TRY THIS
Mention effort.

TIP 20

Thank people in public when appropriate

A public thanks can lift someone. Ask if they are comfortable.

TRY THIS
Thank publicly.

TIP 21

Example: the handwritten card

Sam sent a handwritten card to a mentor. She kept it on her desk.

TRY THIS
Send a card.

TIP 22

Example: the follow-up thanks

Mia sent a second thanks after getting the job. He was delighted.

TRY THIS
Send a second thanks.

TIP 23

Mistake: saying thanks only by text emoji

Add words. A real sentence means more.

TRY THIS
Write a line.

TIP 24

Troubleshoot: when you forgot to say thanks

Say it now with a short apology. Late thanks still warms.

TRY THIS
Send it now.

TIP 25

Drill: write five thank-you lines

Write five short thank-you lines you can reuse.

TRY THIS
Write five.

Easy things to say

When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many networking and career moments.

THANKS

“Thank you so much.”

DETAIL

“Your tip helped me do this.”

RESULT

“It led to this result.”

WARM

“I really appreciate your time.”

OFFER

“Let me know how I can help.”

CLOSE

“Wishing you a great week.”

Your first week

One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.

DAY 1
Say it fast

DAY 2
Name the help

DAY 3
Share the result

DAY 4
Write a note

DAY 5
Send a small gift

DAY 6
Say it in person

DAY 7
Pay it forward

Further reading

• Give and Take (Adam Grant)
• The Go-Giver (Bob Burg and John David Mann)
• Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi)

The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.

← All Giving Before Asking lessons

Next lesson: Protect Yourself From Takers →

These lessons share general learning and everyday ideas. They are not medical or mental health advice. If you feel very anxious, low or unwell, please talk to a doctor or a qualified professional.