Networking & Career / Giving Before Asking / Lesson 03

LESSON 03 · GIVING BEFORE ASKING

Know Your Own Gifts

Eighteen easy tips to know your own gifts, so you give in ways that feel natural and strong.

You have gifts. Use them kindly.

25 tipsEasy things to say7-day plan

Start with tip 1

Jump to the 7-day plan

25 tips that really help

These ideas come from Give and Take (Adam Grant), The Go-Giver (Bob Burg and John David Mann), Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.

TIP 1

Why know your gifts

When you know what you do well, you can offer help with confidence. Real gifts feel natural and help others most.

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Find yours.

TIP 2

List what people ask you for

People often ask for what you do best. Write the last five things people asked.

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Write five.

TIP 3

Ask friends what they value

Ask, what do you come to me for? Their answers may surprise you.

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Ask three.

TIP 4

Look at what you enjoy

You help best where you feel joy. Joy shows in your voice and care.

TRY THIS
Notice joy.

TIP 5

Include small gifts

Listening, laughing, organising and kindness are gifts too. Do not overlook them.

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Add small gifts.

TIP 6

Pick one gift to share this month

Choose one and offer it to someone. Focus makes giving easier.

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Pick one.

TIP 7

Share your time

A short call or a quick review can mean a lot. Time is a precious gift.

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Offer time.

TIP 8

Share what you know

Teach a skill or share a tip. Knowledge grows when it is shared.

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Teach something.

TIP 9

Script: naming a gift

I am good at explaining things simply, can I help you with that? Say it warmly.

TRY THIS
Use it.

TIP 10

Script: offering time

I have thirty minutes on Friday if you would like a hand. Say it kindly.

TRY THIS
Use it.

TIP 11

Script: sharing a skill

I can show you how I set this up, it is easy. Say it lightly.

TRY THIS
Use it.

TIP 12

Mistake: saying I have nothing to offer

Everyone has gifts, so look more closely.

TRY THIS
Look again.

TIP 13

Mistake: comparing your gifts to others

Comparison steals joy, so value your own.

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Own yours.

TIP 14

Mistake: overgiving one gift until you are tired

Balance helps, so share in small, sustainable ways.

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Pace yourself.

TIP 15

Troubleshoot: when you cannot name a gift

Ask three people to describe you in three words. Patterns will show.

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Ask for words.

TIP 16

Troubleshoot: when you are early in your career

Offer curiosity, energy and willingness to learn. That is valued too.

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Offer energy.

TIP 17

Drill: write your gift list

Write ten things you can offer and star three.

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Write ten.

TIP 18

Drill: use one gift this week

Use one of your gifts to help someone this week, and note their reaction.

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Use one.

TIP 19

Ask friends what you do easily

What feels easy to you may feel hard to others. That is a gift.

TRY THIS
Ask two friends.

TIP 20

List five times you helped someone

Look for patterns in how you help. Patterns show strengths.

TRY THIS
List five.

TIP 21

Name a gift you are building

You can grow gifts. Pick one to improve.

TRY THIS
Choose one.

TIP 22

Example: the organiser

Pia always planned trips for friends. She now plans events for a living.

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Name your version.

TIP 23

Example: the listener

Tom listened carefully at gatherings. People told him secrets and trusted him.

TRY THIS
Value listening.

TIP 24

Mistake: calling your gift small

There are no small gifts. Calm kindness changes days.

TRY THIS
Respect your gifts.

TIP 25

Troubleshoot: when you feel you have no skills

Start with kindness, time and attention. Skills can be learned.

TRY THIS
Start with time.

Easy things to say

When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many networking and career moments.

GIFT

“I am good at this.”

ASK

“What do people ask me for?”

USE

“I can help with that.”

LEARN

“I am learning this skill.”

SHARE

“Let me share what I know.”

CLOSE

“That is what I can offer.”

Your first week

One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.

DAY 1
List your skills

DAY 2
Ask three friends

DAY 3
Notice your joy

DAY 4
Pick one gift

DAY 5
Offer it

DAY 6
Practise it

DAY 7
Grow it

Further reading

• Give and Take (Adam Grant)
• The Go-Giver (Bob Burg and John David Mann)
• Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi)

The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.

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These lessons share general learning and everyday ideas. They are not medical or mental health advice. If you feel very anxious, low or unwell, please talk to a doctor or a qualified professional.