Networking & Career / Online Networking / Lesson 04

LESSON 04 · ONLINE NETWORKING

Send Requests That Get Accepted

Eighteen easy tips to send connection requests that get accepted, so your network grows with real people.

Add a kind line. Be human.

27 tipsEasy things to say7-day plan

Start with tip 1

Jump to the 7-day plan

27 tips that really help

These ideas come from Show Your Work! (Austin Kleon), Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi), So Good They Can’t Ignore You (Cal Newport), and everyday practice. Pick one tip and try it today.

TIP 1

Why add a note

A blank request looks like spam. A short kind note shows you are a real person with a reason.

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Add one.

TIP 2

Start with their name

Using a name makes your message warm. Check the spelling before you send.

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Use their name.

TIP 3

Mention a shared link

Say, we both love design, or, we met at the event last week. Shared links raise acceptance.

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Mention a link.

TIP 4

Give a real reason

Say what you liked, such as a post or a talk. Honest compliments are welcome.

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Share one reason.

TIP 5

Keep it under three lines

Busy people skim messages. Short notes get better replies.

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Cut it short.

TIP 6

Do not ask for a favour yet

Connect first and build trust before you ask for help. Patience pays off.

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Wait.

TIP 7

Send to people who fit

Connect with people you truly want to learn from. A smaller list with real chats beats a huge one.

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Pick well.

TIP 8

Respond when others reach out

Thank people who send you requests and say hello. Kindness spreads.

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Reply kindly.

TIP 9

Script: event link

Hi Maya, we met at the design meetup last week, I enjoyed our chat. I would love to connect. Say it warmly.

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Use it.

TIP 10

Script: post link

Hi Maya, I really liked your post about teamwork. I would love to connect. Say it kindly.

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Use it.

TIP 11

Script: shared interest

Hi Maya, I see we both love hiking and teaching. Nice to meet you. Say it lightly.

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Use it.

TIP 12

Mistake: sending a blank request

Blank requests are often ignored, so add a short note.

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Add a note.

TIP 13

Mistake: sending a sales pitch

A pitch right away feels pushy, so lead with kindness.

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Be kind.

TIP 14

Mistake: asking for a job in the first message

It puts pressure on a stranger, so build the link first.

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Be patient.

TIP 15

Troubleshoot: when they do not accept

Do not take it personally, because many people ignore requests. Let it go and try others.

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Move on.

TIP 16

Troubleshoot: when you feel shy sending requests

Send two small ones to people who share your interests. Small steps build courage.

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Start small.

TIP 17

Drill: send five notes this week

Send five connection requests with a kind note and see how many reply.

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Send five.

TIP 18

Drill: write a template

Write one short template and edit the first line for each person.

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Write it.

TIP 19

Check their profile for common ground

Shared schools, groups or interests make a great opener.

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Find one link.

TIP 20

Use the same tone as their posts

If they write warmly, write warmly. Matching helps.

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Match the tone.

TIP 21

Send requests on weekdays

People check networks during work hours. Send in the morning.

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Choose a time.

TIP 22

Limit requests per day

Sending too many may look like spam. Five a day is plenty.

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Set a limit.

TIP 23

Example: the shared group

Hi Priya, I saw we are both in the teachers group, I enjoyed your post on reading games.

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Write one.

TIP 24

Example: the event note

Hi Alex, we both attended last night’s talk. Thank you for sharing your view on leadership.

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Write one.

TIP 25

Mistake: asking for a job in the note

It feels pushy. Keep the note kind and light.

TRY THIS
Keep it light.

TIP 26

Troubleshoot: when your request is declined

Do not worry. Wait and try again later with a new note.

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Move on.

TIP 27

Drill: write a note for three people

Write short notes for three people and send one.

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Write three.

Easy things to say

When you are stuck, pick one of these. They work in many networking and career moments.

HELLO

“Hi, I am Sam.”

LINK

“We share an interest in this.”

REASON

“I enjoyed your post.”

KIND

“I would love to connect.”

THANKS

“Thank you for considering.”

CLOSE

“Have a great week.”

Your first week

One small action a day. Each day is only a little bigger than the last.

DAY 1
Find the person

DAY 2
Read their profile

DAY 3
Write a short note

DAY 4
Mention a link

DAY 5
Send it

DAY 6
Say thanks

DAY 7
Follow up

Further reading

• Show Your Work! (Austin Kleon)
• Never Eat Alone (Keith Ferrazzi)
• So Good They Can’t Ignore You (Cal Newport)

The tips above are written in our own words and are general guidance. The books are suggestions for further reading.

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These lessons share general learning and everyday ideas. They are not medical or mental health advice. If you feel very anxious, low or unwell, please talk to a doctor or a qualified professional.